A Mothers letter

To my sweet baby boy,
 
When I was young my life was far from perfect. I struggled a lot with many things and at a very young age experienced things that kids should never experience. I think that is where I grew that tough skin I am so well known for to this day.
 
I never knew what I wanted to be in my career I just knew I wanted to be the best at it and be happy with it. The one thing I did know is that I wanted to be a mother. Fast forward 10 years later..
 
I was over the moon when I found out I was pregnant and even more so with a boy. That is what I always envisioned for myself. A mommy to an amazing little man. On November 11th not only were you born but that was the day I almost lost you as well. To think in just seconds I could have been mourning you instead of celebrating your life was a lot of emotion to bare. But there you were this perfect little angel just how I pictured you. Thankfully alive and healthy. You even slapped the doctor when he picked you up. That’s when I thought to myself “That’s my boy” :)
 
Of course as a mother you go through all the insecurities of not wanting to make the same mistakes your parents did or mess you up in some way. I don’t think a mother every stops worrying about their child. It comes with the job title.
It’s only been two years but I can’t picture how my life was without you. I can honestly say I have never loved anyone before where you love so much it hurts.
I try to balance between the overprotective mom and the relaxed mother. I think I am more the first than the second but I do try. In the end my goal every day is to see that beautiful smile you have and to make you laugh.
 
I enjoy our dance parties we have and I am very proud that you have a good ear for great music. You currently love hearing Purple Rain from Prince, the Zootopia song from Shakira and everything Coldplay. Although I think your favorite singer is your mother because during bedtime you are always requesting “You are my sunshine my only sunshine”. To be honest that is my favorite song too!
 
On a more serious note, the future is so uncertain at times and I want you to know that as your mother I will always protect you from any harm. It’s me and you kid and no one will ever mess with mama bear especially if her name is Jasmine.
 
Thank you for choosing me as your mother. You have filled my heart in places where I thought only emptiness dwelled.
 
You will forever by my little angel.

Audrey Elise